Tuesday, September 10, 2013
Wednesday, September 4, 2013
#CatTeamBrotherhood
After seeing this post on reddit, I was inspired to do this.
Well worth the time it took to draft. We'll see how this team does in this random public 10-teamer.
Tuesday, September 3, 2013
The revival of the college friends league
2 years ago, a buddy and I tried to kick off a would-be keeper league with some college friends of ours. Due to some murkiness of the rules and a few inattentive owners, the league didn't make it to year two.
Well, with a few fresh faces who will hopefully remain active, and a simplification of the ruleset, the league is back in the form of a ten-team, standard roster and scoring, snake draft, $20 league. To the draft!
My team (by round):
5 C.J. Spiller, Buf RB
16 Maurice Jones-Drew, Jac RB
25 Brandon Marshall, Chi WR
36 Peyton Manning, Den QB
45 Marques Colston, NO WR
56 Dwayne Bowe, KC WR
65 Ryan Mathews, SD RB
76 Pierre Garcon, Wsh WR
85 BenJarvus Green-Ellis, Cin RB
96 Mike Williams, TB WR
105 Emmanuel Sanders, Pit WR
116 Jared Cook, StL TE
125 Patriots D/ST D/ST
136 Christine Michael, Sea RB
145 Greg Zuerlein, StL K
I have to say, I'm pretty happy with this team in general. I think it's well-balanced and has a good mix of steady producers and guys who could significantly outperform their draft position. I'm also pretty happy with how I managed this draft and where I took my guys.
My first round decision was between Rice, Spiller and Charles. Since he's my keeper in the family league, I figure I might as well go all-in on Spiller this year. While I think Rice still has plenty to give, his best years are most likely behind him at this point. That leaves Spiller and Charles, two guys in new systems with ridiculous quicks and insane yards per carry averages. In the end, I like Spiller better because, last year, he produced more fantasy points than Charles on fewer touches and was more consistent. And his new coordinator wants to feed him the ball as much as he can.
I like MJD as a high-end number 2 RB this year. I think he's healthy and still has the ability to just pile up stats as perhaps the only reliable weapon on his team. I was tempted by the likes of Dez Bryant, but I felt that there were enough top-tier wideouts left and a pretty big dropoff after MJD at RB. I lucked out and managed to still land Marshall after waiting 8 picks.
Next up, I was deciding between Peyton and Gronk. I felt that Peyton had fallen too far and wouldn't make it back to me at the next pick, but I at least had a shot at Gronk doing so. Unfortunately, I missed out on Gronk by 2 picks, so I took Colston, a top receiver on a powerful passing offense. I would be surprised if he made it inside the top 10. I would also be surprised if he fell outside the top 20, assuming he's mostly healthy throughout the year. While he can be boom and bust week-to-week, I think his overall production is as reliable as it comes.
Approaching the next turn, I had 3 WRs and 3 RBs left in their respective tiers, so I looked at the guys between my next two picks and noticed that many of them still needed tons of help at WR. So I grabbed Bowe first and managed to still land Mathews on the way back. It's strategic moves like this that make snake drafts at least somewhat interesting. Both of these guys are kind of "has-beens" but have shown great things in the preseason, and still have the ability AND opportunity to be top-10 guys at their respective positions. I'll take that out of my 3rd WR and RB in a shallow ten-teamer.
Regarding the rest of the draft, once again, I waited the shit out of TE having missed Gronk. I knew I was never going to get Graham, since that takes a second round pick this year. In terms of value, I think that's a bad move, as it would take a historic TE season to justify that draft position. However, I like Gronk around the 4th round, because he scores more points per game than Graham and I think he is well on his way to a mid-September return to full-speed. So rather than reaching on any other TE, I just took whoever was available when I felt it was time to grab a TE. I like Witten and Gonzalez and the potential of Vernon Davis, but those guys are going too high as well. After those guys, all the Greg Olsens, Owen Daniels, Kyle Rudolphs and Jared Cooks are all the same to me, so I'm fine getting Cook.
Normally, I would say that anyone who takes a defense before the second to last round is a total fantasy n00b. I broke my golden rule this year. Frankly, in a 10-team league, everyone's team is stacked with talent at all the offensive positions and there is always plenty to find on the waiver-wire, so I think that getting a better defense might help me out. I like that the Jets, Dophins and Bills all have terrible QB situations, meaning plenty of opportunities for the Pats D to capitalize and put up good scores.
Overall, there's only 2 or 3 teams I can look at and say that I would much rather have my team than theirs. Everyone else is pretty strong across the board. Such is life in a ten-team league. Looking at draft results is kind of boring. I was hoping to get to 12 strong, but it wasn't to be. We'll see how this one plays out. It should be fun, anyway.
Well, with a few fresh faces who will hopefully remain active, and a simplification of the ruleset, the league is back in the form of a ten-team, standard roster and scoring, snake draft, $20 league. To the draft!
My team (by round):
5 C.J. Spiller, Buf RB
16 Maurice Jones-Drew, Jac RB
25 Brandon Marshall, Chi WR
36 Peyton Manning, Den QB
45 Marques Colston, NO WR
56 Dwayne Bowe, KC WR
65 Ryan Mathews, SD RB
76 Pierre Garcon, Wsh WR
85 BenJarvus Green-Ellis, Cin RB
96 Mike Williams, TB WR
105 Emmanuel Sanders, Pit WR
116 Jared Cook, StL TE
125 Patriots D/ST D/ST
136 Christine Michael, Sea RB
145 Greg Zuerlein, StL K
I have to say, I'm pretty happy with this team in general. I think it's well-balanced and has a good mix of steady producers and guys who could significantly outperform their draft position. I'm also pretty happy with how I managed this draft and where I took my guys.
My first round decision was between Rice, Spiller and Charles. Since he's my keeper in the family league, I figure I might as well go all-in on Spiller this year. While I think Rice still has plenty to give, his best years are most likely behind him at this point. That leaves Spiller and Charles, two guys in new systems with ridiculous quicks and insane yards per carry averages. In the end, I like Spiller better because, last year, he produced more fantasy points than Charles on fewer touches and was more consistent. And his new coordinator wants to feed him the ball as much as he can.
I like MJD as a high-end number 2 RB this year. I think he's healthy and still has the ability to just pile up stats as perhaps the only reliable weapon on his team. I was tempted by the likes of Dez Bryant, but I felt that there were enough top-tier wideouts left and a pretty big dropoff after MJD at RB. I lucked out and managed to still land Marshall after waiting 8 picks.
Next up, I was deciding between Peyton and Gronk. I felt that Peyton had fallen too far and wouldn't make it back to me at the next pick, but I at least had a shot at Gronk doing so. Unfortunately, I missed out on Gronk by 2 picks, so I took Colston, a top receiver on a powerful passing offense. I would be surprised if he made it inside the top 10. I would also be surprised if he fell outside the top 20, assuming he's mostly healthy throughout the year. While he can be boom and bust week-to-week, I think his overall production is as reliable as it comes.
Approaching the next turn, I had 3 WRs and 3 RBs left in their respective tiers, so I looked at the guys between my next two picks and noticed that many of them still needed tons of help at WR. So I grabbed Bowe first and managed to still land Mathews on the way back. It's strategic moves like this that make snake drafts at least somewhat interesting. Both of these guys are kind of "has-beens" but have shown great things in the preseason, and still have the ability AND opportunity to be top-10 guys at their respective positions. I'll take that out of my 3rd WR and RB in a shallow ten-teamer.
Regarding the rest of the draft, once again, I waited the shit out of TE having missed Gronk. I knew I was never going to get Graham, since that takes a second round pick this year. In terms of value, I think that's a bad move, as it would take a historic TE season to justify that draft position. However, I like Gronk around the 4th round, because he scores more points per game than Graham and I think he is well on his way to a mid-September return to full-speed. So rather than reaching on any other TE, I just took whoever was available when I felt it was time to grab a TE. I like Witten and Gonzalez and the potential of Vernon Davis, but those guys are going too high as well. After those guys, all the Greg Olsens, Owen Daniels, Kyle Rudolphs and Jared Cooks are all the same to me, so I'm fine getting Cook.
Normally, I would say that anyone who takes a defense before the second to last round is a total fantasy n00b. I broke my golden rule this year. Frankly, in a 10-team league, everyone's team is stacked with talent at all the offensive positions and there is always plenty to find on the waiver-wire, so I think that getting a better defense might help me out. I like that the Jets, Dophins and Bills all have terrible QB situations, meaning plenty of opportunities for the Pats D to capitalize and put up good scores.
Overall, there's only 2 or 3 teams I can look at and say that I would much rather have my team than theirs. Everyone else is pretty strong across the board. Such is life in a ten-team league. Looking at draft results is kind of boring. I was hoping to get to 12 strong, but it wasn't to be. We'll see how this one plays out. It should be fun, anyway.
Tuesday, August 27, 2013
Bockmed's Family League
It's time to pwn the family again. It's a 12 team, standard scoring, 1QB, 2RB, 2WR, 1TE, 1Flex, 1K, 1DST, 6BN, snake draft league with 1 keeper kept at one round higher than where you took them last year. I got to keep C.J. Spiller in the 6th round and the 3rd overall pick. It's on like Donkey Kong.
My Team:
My Team:
QB: Matthew Stafford
RB: Arian Foster
RB: C.J. Spiller
WR: Reggie Wayne
WR: Roddy White
TE: Jordan Cameron
Flex: Frank Gore
K: Josh Brown
DST: Tampa Bay
BN: Hakeem Nicks
BN: Cecil Shorts
BN: Fred Jackson
BN: Sidney Rice
BN: Pierre Thomas
BN: Malcom Floyd
What I love about this team:
-My runningbacks! There are certainly concerns with all of them. But really, find me a single runningback not named Adrian Peterson who you know is going to be healthy all year and isn't going to have anyone cutting into their workload. And AD has been hurt before, too. Arian has some definite injury concerns, but considering what was left, I had to take him. The potential to be the number one guy in fantasy is definitely there and Kubiak says he's going to be fine, so my fingers are crossed. C.J. Spiller is going to "run until he pukes" according to his OC. I think they'll be smart with him and he stays healthy and has a monster year. Gore is the centerpiece of his offense, and admittedly on the decline. But in the third round, I am not about to pass on a productive starting runningback. Fred Jackson and Pierre Thomas will both have a role this year and could be fairly useful if someone ahead of them loses their jobs, providing me with all the depth I need at the position.
-My receiving corps should be nice and steady. Both starters get a high volume of catches. I think Roddy is good for 1300 yds 8 TDs and Reggie will regress to something like 1150 and 5, which is still pretty solid. Hakeem is fragile, but an explosive playmaker who could turn into tradebait if he returns to his former glory. Cecil could be awesome if his QB shows some improvement. Sidney and Malcom are just guys really. They'll probably be the first to get dropped when something shiny pops up on the waiver wire. But who knows, they've both shown flashes before.
Dislikes: I missed out on a reliable TE, so I waited and waited and grabbed someone who people are raving about. Honestly, there isn't too much I don't like about this team, so that's what I came up with.
I just kept finding value in this draft, and so I have awesome depth at WR and RB, a QB who could approach 5000 yds and ought to throw for more TDs this year, and a frankly, considering how same all the TEs are after the first 2, who really cares who I have in there?
There are a handful of teams that could pop and dominate if their players turn out, but I don't think any have the caliber of flex player that I do or the overall depth. I'm pretty excited for the prospects in this league this year.
Sunday, August 25, 2013
Cheap League
Earlier today (August 24th) I had the draft for my cheapest league. It is a 12 team, $20 buy-in, 0.5 point PPR, snake draft, 1QB, 2RB, 2WR, 1TE, 1Flex, 1K, 1DST, 6BN. This league is a "keeper league" in the sense that each manager keeps only one player from the year before at one draft round better than the previous season. Two years ago, I drafted Demarco Murray on a whim in the 11th round. With Felix Jones getting hurt that season, I kept him last year in the 10th round and this year in the 9th. This might seem like an epic bargain, but the reality is that each team in this league has one player of similar value at a ridiculous round. (This is often the case with taking a stab at rookie players.) My team:
QB: Cam Newton
RB: David Wilson
RB: Demarco Murray
WR: Calvin Johnson
WR: Andre Johnson
TE: Jared Cook
Flex: Eric Decker
K: Matt Prater
DST: St. Louis
BN: Josh Freeman
BN: Chris Ivory
BN: Andre Brown
BN: Mike Williams
BN: Justin Blackmon
BN: Zach Sudfeld
What I love about this draft:
-My receiving corps is unbelievable. Calvin has the potential to go 10/140/2 each week. Granted, he won't do that all season, but you have to love the best receiver in a pass-heavy system.
-I scored Cam Newton in the 5th round. I'm a firm believer that - this year especially - one should not reach on a quarterback. The disparity between the best QB and the 12th-best QB isn't nearly as great as the best at other positions and the last starter at other said positions. Nonetheless, I watched as round-by-round all of the "big name" quarterbacks went off the board but Cam stayed put. He was actually my #1 QB on my board in PPR format. If he rushes a ton this year, he could be an absolute steal.
-Justin Blackmon. Sure, he's suspended for a few games. But when he comes back? If Henne replaces Gabbert, defenses will have to plan around MJD (on a contract year) and Cecil Shorts coming off of a breakout 2012 campaign. This could open up the field for Blackmon and he could be an elite receiver.
-Sudfeld. See my prior post.
Dislikes:
-My running back corps. Demarco is sure to get a lot of receptions, but will he stay healthy all year? Who knows. David Wilson has so much potential (he had a heck of a game tonight) but what happens when the Giants get to the goal line? How many goal line TDs will be sniped by Andre Brown? Sure I also drafted Brown (mostly as insurance) but I'm not going to do a committee in my backfield. Ivory is a nice piece because he is a starter and will get plenty of touches, but it's the Jets offense and he is unproven as a the sole guy. I like that he gives me flexibility in the event that Demarco gets hurt and/or the Giants go committee, but still, no one wants Ivory to have to start week-in and week-out.
-Andre Johnson. He's getting old. Can he still be productive? He had a great season last year in terms of receptions and yardage, but he rarely found the end zone. Can he turn that around? Who knows. I'm fortunate to have a ton of depth at WR, so if AJ gets hurt I can integrate Decker/Williams/Blackmon more consistently. Still, I took him high in the draft. At that spot, you want your players to turn out.
Looking at the starting lineups of other managers in this league, I really like how my team turned out. If I avoid the injury bug, this could be a solid unit that will be a force to be reckoned with in the playoffs.
Empire League
Well, it's that time of year again.
FANTASY FOOTBALL.
Last night (Friday, August 23rd) I had my first draft of the year. It was for my "Empire League." This league is a $100 buy-in. There are 12 teams, standard scoring, auction draft, 1QB 2RB 2WR 1Flex 1TE 1K 1DST 6BN.
Unlike other leagues, at the end of the season, only half the pot is paid out. 1st: $350 2nd: $150 3rd: $100. The other half of the buy-in goes to the "empire pot." In order to win the "empire pot" a manager must win in back-to-back seasons. Hence, the minimum the "empire pot" can be is $1,200 assuming that the same manager wins the championship in both year 1 and year 2. (For example, if no one wins back-to-back until year 9 and year 10, the "empire pot" is worth $6,000!)
Part of the strategy of this league is drafting a winning roster. The other part is drafting young players that are skilled and can lead your team in the future.
My team shook out as follows: (the age of the player is included in parentheses)
QB: Matt Schaub (32)
RB: CJ Spiller (26)
RB: Eddie Lacy (22)
WR: Larry Fitzgerald (29)
WR: Randall Cobb (22)
TE: Jimmy Graham (26)
F: Torrey Smith (24)
K: Dan Bailey (who cares)
DST: New England (irrelevant)
BN: Josh Freeman (25)
BN: Chris Ivory (25)
BN: Jonathan Franklin (23)
BN: Kenny Britt (24)
BN: Rueben Randle (22)
BN: Zach Sudfeld (24)
Will this team win this year? Probably not. Do I have a young core to contend consistently for the next 3 to 5 years? Absolutely.
Notes about the draft:
Originally, I wanted to target Trent Richardson as my franchise player. He is just 22, an elite running back, and presumably has many years ahead of him as the starter in Cleveland. CJ Spiller was nominated about 6th overall, and I had him going for about $57 on my board. As the bidding slowed down, I kept bidding on him because he was being undervalued. Suddenly the bidding stopped altogether and I got him for $49. It was at that point that I had to readjust my drafting strategy (and budget) entirely. I suddenly shifted from being able to afford a crappy tight end to having enough money to draft the best tight end possible.
I had no interest in drafting Larry Fitzgerald, but he was another instance in which the bidding suddenly stopped and I was stuck with a player going for strong value. Am I high on Fitz? No. Do I think he will do better with Palmer as QB? Yes. Was he worth the $23 I paid for him? No doubt about it.
What I love about this draft:
-I love that I have great bench depth. Ivory is a viable bye-week filler, and if Lacy (or Franklin) don't pan out, at least I have a majority-of-the-touches running back to fill in. Britt was an absolute steal at $4, and he could easily compete with Torrey to be my starter at flex. If Britt is finally healthy and lives up to his potential, I could have a very dynamic receiving corps.
-Zach Sudfeld. I'm so high on this guy. If Gronk is injured for the foreseeable future, Sudfeld will get all of the reps at TE and could put up huge numbers. Even if Gronk is healthy, Sudfeld has been so impressive in pre-season that there are rumors that the Patriots may be going to two-tight end sets to include him in the passing game. Sudfeld could absolutely be a key player for my team.
Dislikes:
-Rueben Randle. Will he emerge as a viable threat? Who knows. I'm basically banking on Nicks being hurt as some point in the season.
-The Schaub/Freeman carousel. I knew going in that quarterbacks would be way over valued. (Rodgers went for $69(!!!!) and Brees, Brady, and Manning all for $40+. Just incredible.) For this reason, I chose to wait it out, get good core players later, and take a lower-level QB. Both Schaub and Freeman are viable starters, but they won't put up game-changing numbers.
I don't view this as a championship-contending team in 2013. But could it win back-to-back seasons sometime within the 2014 - 2017 time frame? Barring injuries, I think it is plausible. Here's to hoping.
FANTASY FOOTBALL.
Last night (Friday, August 23rd) I had my first draft of the year. It was for my "Empire League." This league is a $100 buy-in. There are 12 teams, standard scoring, auction draft, 1QB 2RB 2WR 1Flex 1TE 1K 1DST 6BN.
Unlike other leagues, at the end of the season, only half the pot is paid out. 1st: $350 2nd: $150 3rd: $100. The other half of the buy-in goes to the "empire pot." In order to win the "empire pot" a manager must win in back-to-back seasons. Hence, the minimum the "empire pot" can be is $1,200 assuming that the same manager wins the championship in both year 1 and year 2. (For example, if no one wins back-to-back until year 9 and year 10, the "empire pot" is worth $6,000!)
Part of the strategy of this league is drafting a winning roster. The other part is drafting young players that are skilled and can lead your team in the future.
My team shook out as follows: (the age of the player is included in parentheses)
QB: Matt Schaub (32)
RB: CJ Spiller (26)
RB: Eddie Lacy (22)
WR: Larry Fitzgerald (29)
WR: Randall Cobb (22)
TE: Jimmy Graham (26)
F: Torrey Smith (24)
K: Dan Bailey (who cares)
DST: New England (irrelevant)
BN: Josh Freeman (25)
BN: Chris Ivory (25)
BN: Jonathan Franklin (23)
BN: Kenny Britt (24)
BN: Rueben Randle (22)
BN: Zach Sudfeld (24)
Will this team win this year? Probably not. Do I have a young core to contend consistently for the next 3 to 5 years? Absolutely.
Notes about the draft:
Originally, I wanted to target Trent Richardson as my franchise player. He is just 22, an elite running back, and presumably has many years ahead of him as the starter in Cleveland. CJ Spiller was nominated about 6th overall, and I had him going for about $57 on my board. As the bidding slowed down, I kept bidding on him because he was being undervalued. Suddenly the bidding stopped altogether and I got him for $49. It was at that point that I had to readjust my drafting strategy (and budget) entirely. I suddenly shifted from being able to afford a crappy tight end to having enough money to draft the best tight end possible.
I had no interest in drafting Larry Fitzgerald, but he was another instance in which the bidding suddenly stopped and I was stuck with a player going for strong value. Am I high on Fitz? No. Do I think he will do better with Palmer as QB? Yes. Was he worth the $23 I paid for him? No doubt about it.
What I love about this draft:
-I love that I have great bench depth. Ivory is a viable bye-week filler, and if Lacy (or Franklin) don't pan out, at least I have a majority-of-the-touches running back to fill in. Britt was an absolute steal at $4, and he could easily compete with Torrey to be my starter at flex. If Britt is finally healthy and lives up to his potential, I could have a very dynamic receiving corps.
-Zach Sudfeld. I'm so high on this guy. If Gronk is injured for the foreseeable future, Sudfeld will get all of the reps at TE and could put up huge numbers. Even if Gronk is healthy, Sudfeld has been so impressive in pre-season that there are rumors that the Patriots may be going to two-tight end sets to include him in the passing game. Sudfeld could absolutely be a key player for my team.
Dislikes:
-Rueben Randle. Will he emerge as a viable threat? Who knows. I'm basically banking on Nicks being hurt as some point in the season.
-The Schaub/Freeman carousel. I knew going in that quarterbacks would be way over valued. (Rodgers went for $69(!!!!) and Brees, Brady, and Manning all for $40+. Just incredible.) For this reason, I chose to wait it out, get good core players later, and take a lower-level QB. Both Schaub and Freeman are viable starters, but they won't put up game-changing numbers.
I don't view this as a championship-contending team in 2013. But could it win back-to-back seasons sometime within the 2014 - 2017 time frame? Barring injuries, I think it is plausible. Here's to hoping.
Friday, August 9, 2013
I didn't know I was looking,
but I found the best cat videos on the interwebs. Really good production value on these bitches.
Tuesday, August 6, 2013
Monday, June 17, 2013
For those of you who aren't gigantic nerds,
last week was E3, the Electronic Entertainment Expo. It's a huge event held in L.A. every summer, and historically, it's the event where Sony, Microsoft and Nintendo reveal their new consoles and all of the publishers talk about their upcoming games. For me, it was a week of watching streams on twitch.tv and video game trailers on Youtube.
If you've been on Reddit in the last week, you probably saw lots of posts praising Sony and the Playstation 4, and lots hating on Microsoft and the Xbox One (which I think is a pretty shitty name for what it's worth). This is because Microsoft is forcing you to connect to the internet at least once every 24 hours as a DRM feature. This has a lot of people pissed/baffled because even if you only play offline single-player games, you still have to have an internet connection to play them. And while Microsoft was saying, "fuck you, if you don't like it, buy an Xbox 360," Sony was saying all the right things (and taking some shots at Microsoft) and brought in a console that has better hardware and costs $100 less than the Xbone. None of this really matters to me because PC Master Race.
What I was most excited for was the game releases. There were a few that I'm pretty excited for. The game that probably caught the most buzz was Titanfall. This is a game that is being developed by the former heads of Infinity Ward, the developer that made COD4: Modern Warfare, the best game in the COD series, and the game that 90% of first person shooters have been trying to copy for the last 6 years (including all the ensuing COD games). It's a game that involves playing as the pilot of a mech as well as outside the mech with all kinds of crazy jetpack parkour. Basically, it looks like a crazy, fun, fast-paced game and the best part is that it's not a sequel. In other awesomeness, the game that gave me the hardest boner was merely teased in a 30 second trailer, but oh my god, this is basically what I've been wet dreaming about for a couple of years now. That's right, Star Wars: Battlefront is being rebooted and is under development by DICE. I can't even tell you how many times I played through the original Battlefront game on Playstation 2, and to this day I still play Battlefront 2 with a couple of my buddies (usually paired with a stiff rum and coke). But what makes me most excited is who is making the game. DICE is the maker of Battlefield and for a decade now, they have been a leader in gaming technology. Their Frostbite 3 game engine is probably the best game engine in terms of physics, environment destruction, particle effects and lighting. Battlefield 3, a 2 year old game, is still considered to be among the games with the best graphics. Basically, I'm super excited to see what they can do with an amazing game concept with amazing graphics. I wouldn't be surprised if Battlefront is game of the year when it comes out a couple of years from now. While there were some other cool games in the adventure and rpg genres, I'm not going to go on and on about them. And I'm not going to go into EA Sports' 'incredible' new dribbling technology. Finally, there was one game that had me soaking up every tidbit of information I could find, and that was Battlefield 4. Those of you who know me know that I play a craptonne of Battlefield 3, so of course I'm going to be interested in this particular sequel. What DICE did at E3 was pretty awesome. They set up 66 gaming PCs (!) at their "booth" and let convention goers play a round of the multiplayer while they streamed the whole thing and had commentators use the new spectator mode feature to show off the gameplay. They also had a few competitive players and big-name Youtubers on to do interviews. Basically, it looks like they're bringing in a lot of the features that BF3 players have been asking for. They're bringing back the Commander position from previous titles like BF2 and BF: 2142. The commander is something that one player on the server can volunteer to be. As commander, they get an overview of the map and try to organize the team into an effective combat unit by giving squads different attack and defend orders. The commander also has the ability to do things like call in artillery strikes and drop supplies for the people on the ground. In addition to bringing back the commander, they've upped the squad size from 4 to 5 players and made several other gameplay tweaks, such as increasing the destructibility of levels (seriously, you can bring down a skyscraper) that people have been asking for. While some people are bitching "hurr durr it's the same game, why isn't this DLC, this is just Battlefield 3.5," I'm just glad that they're making some good tweaks to an already great game, and I'll happily pay full price and get it day one. Considering how many hours I've put into BF3, I know it'll be money well spent.
TL:DR
E3 was last week. Here's what happened:
If you've been on Reddit in the last week, you probably saw lots of posts praising Sony and the Playstation 4, and lots hating on Microsoft and the Xbox One (which I think is a pretty shitty name for what it's worth). This is because Microsoft is forcing you to connect to the internet at least once every 24 hours as a DRM feature. This has a lot of people pissed/baffled because even if you only play offline single-player games, you still have to have an internet connection to play them. And while Microsoft was saying, "fuck you, if you don't like it, buy an Xbox 360," Sony was saying all the right things (and taking some shots at Microsoft) and brought in a console that has better hardware and costs $100 less than the Xbone. None of this really matters to me because PC Master Race.
What I was most excited for was the game releases. There were a few that I'm pretty excited for. The game that probably caught the most buzz was Titanfall. This is a game that is being developed by the former heads of Infinity Ward, the developer that made COD4: Modern Warfare, the best game in the COD series, and the game that 90% of first person shooters have been trying to copy for the last 6 years (including all the ensuing COD games). It's a game that involves playing as the pilot of a mech as well as outside the mech with all kinds of crazy jetpack parkour. Basically, it looks like a crazy, fun, fast-paced game and the best part is that it's not a sequel. In other awesomeness, the game that gave me the hardest boner was merely teased in a 30 second trailer, but oh my god, this is basically what I've been wet dreaming about for a couple of years now. That's right, Star Wars: Battlefront is being rebooted and is under development by DICE. I can't even tell you how many times I played through the original Battlefront game on Playstation 2, and to this day I still play Battlefront 2 with a couple of my buddies (usually paired with a stiff rum and coke). But what makes me most excited is who is making the game. DICE is the maker of Battlefield and for a decade now, they have been a leader in gaming technology. Their Frostbite 3 game engine is probably the best game engine in terms of physics, environment destruction, particle effects and lighting. Battlefield 3, a 2 year old game, is still considered to be among the games with the best graphics. Basically, I'm super excited to see what they can do with an amazing game concept with amazing graphics. I wouldn't be surprised if Battlefront is game of the year when it comes out a couple of years from now. While there were some other cool games in the adventure and rpg genres, I'm not going to go on and on about them. And I'm not going to go into EA Sports' 'incredible' new dribbling technology. Finally, there was one game that had me soaking up every tidbit of information I could find, and that was Battlefield 4. Those of you who know me know that I play a craptonne of Battlefield 3, so of course I'm going to be interested in this particular sequel. What DICE did at E3 was pretty awesome. They set up 66 gaming PCs (!) at their "booth" and let convention goers play a round of the multiplayer while they streamed the whole thing and had commentators use the new spectator mode feature to show off the gameplay. They also had a few competitive players and big-name Youtubers on to do interviews. Basically, it looks like they're bringing in a lot of the features that BF3 players have been asking for. They're bringing back the Commander position from previous titles like BF2 and BF: 2142. The commander is something that one player on the server can volunteer to be. As commander, they get an overview of the map and try to organize the team into an effective combat unit by giving squads different attack and defend orders. The commander also has the ability to do things like call in artillery strikes and drop supplies for the people on the ground. In addition to bringing back the commander, they've upped the squad size from 4 to 5 players and made several other gameplay tweaks, such as increasing the destructibility of levels (seriously, you can bring down a skyscraper) that people have been asking for. While some people are bitching "hurr durr it's the same game, why isn't this DLC, this is just Battlefield 3.5," I'm just glad that they're making some good tweaks to an already great game, and I'll happily pay full price and get it day one. Considering how many hours I've put into BF3, I know it'll be money well spent.
TL:DR
E3 was last week. Here's what happened:
Sunday, June 2, 2013
WHAT THIS BLOG REALLY NEEDS
I recently adopted a cat (well..."recent" in terms of "blog update recent") and have found great things to do with him. I mainly post videos on Facebook, but this one was just too gosh darn controversial to post.
Is it animal cruelty? Or the greatest use of a cat ever? I'll let you decide.
Presenting: Superman cat
Is it animal cruelty? Or the greatest use of a cat ever? I'll let you decide.
Presenting: Superman cat
The Silly Adventures of Mr. Mochi
It's been over a month since anyone has posted to the blog. I kind of feel like we need a really strong post to get this thing back on its feet again.
Yup.
Yup.
Thursday, April 25, 2013
Draft Day Predictions
The first round of the NFL draft is tonight, and I'd like to offer up a few predictions. I think it's safe to say that this will be one of the most active NFL drafts in history and numerous teams will be trading up and down for positional purposes. Spielman loves to be active on draft day, and I don't see him staying put in this draft. That being said, the draft isn't as deep as it has been in previous years. There is no real "go to" guy to be drafted, and for that reason the draft may develop organically and some teams may choose to keep their current draft positions solely because some players may slip to them. To be frank, a rated #8 overall on one team could easily be rated #25 on another. With the exception of the first few lineman, the difference between the 10th best player and the 25th best player is fairly minimal. The real difference is position, not talent or potential.
Thus, I see all three draft-day scenarios for the Vikings being completely plausible (trade up, keep current picks, trade down). I think making a trade of some sort is slightly more plausible than just keeping our two picks. Here is my best guess:
Scenario 1: Trade Up (Probability: 40%)
The Chargers have been quite candid that they aren't too concerned with moving up and may move down in the draft. They have a pressing need for an offensive lineman, but have admitted that they think the field of offensive lineman is so deep this year that they will just draft the best player that falls to them. There will be a number of second-tier O-Lineman still on the board in the board in the pick #18-25 range of the draft. Thus, I see the Vikings packaging a deal with the Chargers (the Dolphins and Saints are lesser possibilities here, too) sending the #23 pick and a our 2nd (or 3rd if negotiations go well) for the rights to the #11 (or the #12/#15 if we go with Miami/New Orleans instead) overall pick.
At #11 I see only three possibilities: Chance Warmack, Dee Milliner, and Tavon Austin. I think Dee Milliner will be off the board by then, I think this is reaching for Warmack a bit, and this would be perfect for Tavon Austin if the Jets haven't already drafted him (and if Saint Louis hasn't moved up to take him as well.)
My prediction: We take the safe route and draft Chase Warmack.
With #25 I see us either taking Manti Te'o or Cordarrelle Patterson.
My prediction: We take Manti Te'o.
Scenario 2: Trade Down (Probability: 40%)
With the new collective bargaining agreement in place, teams that draft a Quarterback in the first round are allowed to place an option on the 5th year of a rookie contract. This is huge considering it is the most important position in all of football. As such, I see the Vikings keeping their #23 pick and trading away the #25.
At #23 I see us again with 3 choices: Desmond Trufant, Bjoern Werner, and Sheldon Richardson. My prediction: we go with Bjoern Werner as the presumptive Jared Allen replacement.
If Buffalo does not take Nassib with their pick, they will trade with the Vikes for his rights at #25. Philadelphia could do this with Geno Smith. Jacksonville could do this with Matt Barkley. We would presumably gain their 2nd round pick and perhaps a 4th rounder as well.
Scenario 3: Keep both picks (Probability: 20%)
At #23 I think we consider Werner, Trufant, and a receiver. My prediction: we take Cordarrelle Patterson. The security of a pick almost immediately afterwards means we can then focus on defense.
At #25 we really have three options: best LB available (Te'o), best DL available (Werner/Richardson), best CB available (Trufant). My guess is we will go with Te'o because Werner may be off the board and Trufant isn't as safe of a pick as Te'o.
That being said: who knows. It will be an interesting night. Theoretically we could even trade up (get rid of #23 and 2nd rounder for the rights to a top 12 pick) and then trade down (get rid of #25 for a different 2nd rounder and say a 4th rounder). Who knows. It'll be a fun night for football fans.
Thus, I see all three draft-day scenarios for the Vikings being completely plausible (trade up, keep current picks, trade down). I think making a trade of some sort is slightly more plausible than just keeping our two picks. Here is my best guess:
Scenario 1: Trade Up (Probability: 40%)
The Chargers have been quite candid that they aren't too concerned with moving up and may move down in the draft. They have a pressing need for an offensive lineman, but have admitted that they think the field of offensive lineman is so deep this year that they will just draft the best player that falls to them. There will be a number of second-tier O-Lineman still on the board in the board in the pick #18-25 range of the draft. Thus, I see the Vikings packaging a deal with the Chargers (the Dolphins and Saints are lesser possibilities here, too) sending the #23 pick and a our 2nd (or 3rd if negotiations go well) for the rights to the #11 (or the #12/#15 if we go with Miami/New Orleans instead) overall pick.
At #11 I see only three possibilities: Chance Warmack, Dee Milliner, and Tavon Austin. I think Dee Milliner will be off the board by then, I think this is reaching for Warmack a bit, and this would be perfect for Tavon Austin if the Jets haven't already drafted him (and if Saint Louis hasn't moved up to take him as well.)
My prediction: We take the safe route and draft Chase Warmack.
With #25 I see us either taking Manti Te'o or Cordarrelle Patterson.
My prediction: We take Manti Te'o.
Scenario 2: Trade Down (Probability: 40%)
With the new collective bargaining agreement in place, teams that draft a Quarterback in the first round are allowed to place an option on the 5th year of a rookie contract. This is huge considering it is the most important position in all of football. As such, I see the Vikings keeping their #23 pick and trading away the #25.
At #23 I see us again with 3 choices: Desmond Trufant, Bjoern Werner, and Sheldon Richardson. My prediction: we go with Bjoern Werner as the presumptive Jared Allen replacement.
If Buffalo does not take Nassib with their pick, they will trade with the Vikes for his rights at #25. Philadelphia could do this with Geno Smith. Jacksonville could do this with Matt Barkley. We would presumably gain their 2nd round pick and perhaps a 4th rounder as well.
Scenario 3: Keep both picks (Probability: 20%)
At #23 I think we consider Werner, Trufant, and a receiver. My prediction: we take Cordarrelle Patterson. The security of a pick almost immediately afterwards means we can then focus on defense.
At #25 we really have three options: best LB available (Te'o), best DL available (Werner/Richardson), best CB available (Trufant). My guess is we will go with Te'o because Werner may be off the board and Trufant isn't as safe of a pick as Te'o.
That being said: who knows. It will be an interesting night. Theoretically we could even trade up (get rid of #23 and 2nd rounder for the rights to a top 12 pick) and then trade down (get rid of #25 for a different 2nd rounder and say a 4th rounder). Who knows. It'll be a fun night for football fans.
Wednesday, April 24, 2013
A Depressing Topic
About a month ago on Reddit, someone posted to AskReddit something along the lines of "What is the most mind-blowing quote you know?"
As I was perusing this topic, one of the highest-rated comments was roughly as follows: "If you choose not to have children, you will be the first person in your direct lineage since the very first humans that had children not to do so." Pretty powerful stuff.
Similarly, one of the other highest-rated comments was approximately this: "At some point, the last person to have ever known you or to have carried memories of you will die, and your existence will be gone forever." That's pretty chilling.
I hadn't really stewed over these quotes. From an "emotional" standpoint, I don't find these realities too intimidating. I mean, I'm a rationally-thinking human being that understands, frankly, time goes on and eventually generations pass by. I have no idea of the names of my relatives 20 generations removed. Heck, given the plight of my Jewish ancestors escaping persecution and my Bohemian ancestors escaping Communism, I don't even know the names of my relatives 3 generations removed. With the exception of Icelanders and a few remote people-groups, I think just about everyone else on planet Earth is in the same boat.
But today I think this idea finally started to resonate with me. I learned that my great-uncle on my father's side passed away. He was the last remaining child of those 2 generations removed from me on my paternal grandfather's side. So, just like that, an entire generation of my ancestry has been removed from existence. It's really weird to think about.
But here's where I'd like to put a positive spin on things. When you think about it, the fact that I witnessed, was in contact with, and personally knew almost all of my paternal grandfather's generation is kind of mind-blowing in itself. Not only did I know them, but I got to experience about a quarter-century with them living at the same time as me. That's incredible, isn't it?
Just 100 years ago the average life expectancy for a male in America was about 48 years. Knowing your grandparents was almost unheard of. Think of how far we've come in just 100 years. How much farther will we go by 2113? Given the miracles of modern medicine and the advancement of technology, it's not impractical to think that my grandchildren and great-grandchildren could live to be 200 or 250 years old. Impossible, right? Wrong! 100 years ago it was unfathomable that human beings would live on average into their 70s and 80s. Humans living to be 100 would have been laughed at. Now we consider it a normal event and are no longer blown away by the fact that humans can live to be 100. It's completely plausible. How is my declaration that my grandchildren will live to be 200 years old any more far-fetched than a scientist in 1913 saying that his grandchildren would live to be 80? It's really not that different when you think about it.
But here's where I think we are luckiest and where, as Americans, we are far too ignorant. In the status quo, there are still billions of people sharing our planet that will never meet their grandparents. One of my best friends in grad school is a heck of a guy from Zimbabwe. Three of his four grandparents were dead before he was even born. His grandmother is 64 years old. Not only is she the eldest person in her community, but he was the only one of all of the kids in his primary school to have a living grandparent. Pretty crazy, right? Here we can compare the life expectancy of a North Dakotan to a Zimbabwean and it's as though possibilities for one are endless and the other is just coming around to the standard of living in the 1900s. Yet we are inhabiting the same planet at the same time.
I guess the moral of the story is that were are incredibly lucky getting luckier. We shouldn't take that for granted. And who knows, maybe somewhere out there is a Zimbabwean blogging right now - part of the first generation in the developing world that will love long enough to meet all of their grandkids.
As I was perusing this topic, one of the highest-rated comments was roughly as follows: "If you choose not to have children, you will be the first person in your direct lineage since the very first humans that had children not to do so." Pretty powerful stuff.
Similarly, one of the other highest-rated comments was approximately this: "At some point, the last person to have ever known you or to have carried memories of you will die, and your existence will be gone forever." That's pretty chilling.
I hadn't really stewed over these quotes. From an "emotional" standpoint, I don't find these realities too intimidating. I mean, I'm a rationally-thinking human being that understands, frankly, time goes on and eventually generations pass by. I have no idea of the names of my relatives 20 generations removed. Heck, given the plight of my Jewish ancestors escaping persecution and my Bohemian ancestors escaping Communism, I don't even know the names of my relatives 3 generations removed. With the exception of Icelanders and a few remote people-groups, I think just about everyone else on planet Earth is in the same boat.
But today I think this idea finally started to resonate with me. I learned that my great-uncle on my father's side passed away. He was the last remaining child of those 2 generations removed from me on my paternal grandfather's side. So, just like that, an entire generation of my ancestry has been removed from existence. It's really weird to think about.
But here's where I'd like to put a positive spin on things. When you think about it, the fact that I witnessed, was in contact with, and personally knew almost all of my paternal grandfather's generation is kind of mind-blowing in itself. Not only did I know them, but I got to experience about a quarter-century with them living at the same time as me. That's incredible, isn't it?
Just 100 years ago the average life expectancy for a male in America was about 48 years. Knowing your grandparents was almost unheard of. Think of how far we've come in just 100 years. How much farther will we go by 2113? Given the miracles of modern medicine and the advancement of technology, it's not impractical to think that my grandchildren and great-grandchildren could live to be 200 or 250 years old. Impossible, right? Wrong! 100 years ago it was unfathomable that human beings would live on average into their 70s and 80s. Humans living to be 100 would have been laughed at. Now we consider it a normal event and are no longer blown away by the fact that humans can live to be 100. It's completely plausible. How is my declaration that my grandchildren will live to be 200 years old any more far-fetched than a scientist in 1913 saying that his grandchildren would live to be 80? It's really not that different when you think about it.
But here's where I think we are luckiest and where, as Americans, we are far too ignorant. In the status quo, there are still billions of people sharing our planet that will never meet their grandparents. One of my best friends in grad school is a heck of a guy from Zimbabwe. Three of his four grandparents were dead before he was even born. His grandmother is 64 years old. Not only is she the eldest person in her community, but he was the only one of all of the kids in his primary school to have a living grandparent. Pretty crazy, right? Here we can compare the life expectancy of a North Dakotan to a Zimbabwean and it's as though possibilities for one are endless and the other is just coming around to the standard of living in the 1900s. Yet we are inhabiting the same planet at the same time.
I guess the moral of the story is that were are incredibly lucky getting luckier. We shouldn't take that for granted. And who knows, maybe somewhere out there is a Zimbabwean blogging right now - part of the first generation in the developing world that will love long enough to meet all of their grandkids.
Tuesday, April 23, 2013
Please wait until noon to reinforce stereotypes.
I moved to Minneapolis over 4 years ago to begin my college career. Prior to that, I spent the majority of my formative years in one of the 50 least diverse small towns in America. Don't get me wrong, I don't believe that Minneapolis is all that diverse in comparison to many other cities in America and it's not all that scary of a place, but certain individuals belonging to certain groups have blatantly reinforced stereotypes in front of me on numerous occasions, and because of that, I think it's fair to say that I'm probably more prejudiced now than I was when I left that sheltered little town.
This morning, on my bus ride to school, a couple of Native American chumps were stealing sips (chugs) of Four Loko while the bus driver wasn't looking. It's because people like this are loud, obnoxious and half drunk by 9:00 am that I am no longer surprised, or offended when something like this becomes top comment on a reddit post.
This morning, on my bus ride to school, a couple of Native American chumps were stealing sips (chugs) of Four Loko while the bus driver wasn't looking. It's because people like this are loud, obnoxious and half drunk by 9:00 am that I am no longer surprised, or offended when something like this becomes top comment on a reddit post.
Tuesday, April 9, 2013
a first
i'm laying in bed with the covers over the lower half of my body to keep me warm. my laptop is laying on my chest while i watch game of thrones.
my cat is at the foot of the bed.
suddenly: my balls itch.
i reach under the blankets to itch them.
unbeknownst to me, my cat is staring.
the movement under the covers intrigues him.
out of nowhere: cat pounces directly on my balls.
i'm now laying in bed with the covers over an ice pack covering the lower half of my body.
my cat is at the foot of the bed.
suddenly: my balls itch.
i reach under the blankets to itch them.
unbeknownst to me, my cat is staring.
the movement under the covers intrigues him.
out of nowhere: cat pounces directly on my balls.
i'm now laying in bed with the covers over an ice pack covering the lower half of my body.
Friday, April 5, 2013
Wednesday, March 27, 2013
fingers crossed?
i know i'm about to jinx this, but i just had to share.
i really love march madness. i always fill out the maximum number of brackets on yahoo just to see what happens. i also always sign up for the "best bracket contest" in the hopes that - somehow, out of the millions of entries - mine will be the greatest.
well, as you can see from the following picture, through the first four, second, and third round of the tournament....i think i have a chance.
i really love march madness. i always fill out the maximum number of brackets on yahoo just to see what happens. i also always sign up for the "best bracket contest" in the hopes that - somehow, out of the millions of entries - mine will be the greatest.
well, as you can see from the following picture, through the first four, second, and third round of the tournament....i think i have a chance.
one of my brackets (feel free to judge the name...i named all of my brackets after animal sounds) is doing exceptionally well. yes, i had florida gulf coast beating georgetown. no, i did not have them beating san diego state. no, i did not have harvard winning. yes, i did have wichita state in the sweet 16.
what i am most impressed about this bracket is that i went 8/8 on the 8/9 and 7/10 games. i feel like those really are the true toss-ups. as is always the case, in just about every other bracket i had ole miss beating wisconsin...except in this one. also, in every other bracket, i had la salle over kansas state...except this one. so that part of the bracket is really the only major blemish.
with the exception of fgcu in the sweet 16, i have a perfect right side of the bracket. i'm ok with that.
what gets me really excited about the chance of contending for the top prize, however, is that i have a not-so-likely final 4. if it hits, i guarantee i'm one of the few to have it:
(1) louisville
(6) arizona
(4) michigan
(1) indiana
you best believe the entire osu/isu game i was pleading for iowa state to pull it off. the west bracket is in such chaos that i feel like arizona would have had a cake walk to the final 4 had that happened. unfortunately their next game is against ohio state, so i will be quite nervous as that game progresses. really though, how many have arizona in the final four?
michigan was my outside pick as i think the south bracket is probably the toughest. kansas and florida are both great teams. i was hoping that unc would beat kansas to set up an easier path for michigan. nonetheless, KU's struggles against unc make me hope that trey burke and company can pull off an upset. i still think florida is the best team in that bracket (i have them in all of my other final 4s) so i might just be depressed. nonetheless, if michigan makes it to the final four, i think i'll still be one of the few to have them.
louisville has looked good. i think they have way more talent than oregon. one always needs to worry about coach k and coach izzo, so whichever team they face in the elite 8 could pose a big threat. either way, i still like their chances.
indiana, if you ask me, is the most talented team. i understand that syracuse is a tough matchup, but i don't think syracuse has the depth they have had in previous years to compete. oladipo can run circles around any of their players. i'm not a huge fan of marquette, and their close games against davidson and butler prove they are vulnerable. i like miami to make the elite 8. that will be a brawl of a game, and i can't wait to see who wins the miami-indiana matchup.
anyway, i know the remaining permutations/combinations/possibilities of elite 8, final 4, and championship games are substantial. i'm not counting my hens before they hatch, but i've never had a bracket this good this far into the tourney. one can dream.
Monday, March 18, 2013
Shit Aerospace Graduate Students Say
(with an Indian (dot, not feather) accent):
"My grid divergence is 10 to the minus 9, bitches. Such a good result. So nice and smooth..."
Sometimes I enjoy my shared office.
"My grid divergence is 10 to the minus 9, bitches. Such a good result. So nice and smooth..."
Sometimes I enjoy my shared office.
Saturday, March 16, 2013
marital bliss
here's a nice story about the sociological approach to gender roles. feel free to pick a side at the conclusion of this story.
the other day i was at the grocery store picking up a few things for lunches for the week (and to re-stock on some stuff we were running low on). about half-way through my grocery shopping adventure, my phone started to vibrate. i took it out of my pocket and realized that my wife was calling me.
ahmed: "hi hun."
wife: "hi. could you pick me up some brownies? i'd like to make brownies tonight."
ahmed: "sure, what kind?"
wife: "the good kind. just get the best brownies you can find, i want to go all out tonight."
with that, i proceeded to find the most expensive box of double fudge brownies the grocery store had to offer.
fast forward about 15 minutes. i arrive home, unload groceries, and begin putting them away in the fridge/cupboards.
upon seeing that i am putting away the items i just purchased, my wife popped into the kitchen to help me unload everything. she was also on a mission: she wanted to unpack the brownies and begin baking them immediately. after a few seconds of rummaging through plastic bags, she unloaded the brownie box, took out a pan, and turned on the oven.
a few seconds later, i heard the following:
wife: "why did you buy low-fat brownies? is there something i should know?"
at this point, like all rationally thinking males in my position, you can imagine the plethora of four-letter-words roaming around in my head.
ahmed: "they were the most expensive box. i just assumed when you said you wanted to the good kind of brownies, you meant the most expensive."
wife: "no. when i say i want the good kind of brownies, i mean that i want the richest, fattest, worst-brownies-for-your-health possible. i absolutely cannot believe you bought me low-fat brownies!"
i then proceeded to reference our months of pre-marital counseling in order to assure her that - as we previously learned - men and women interpret tasks much differently from one another.
so blogosphere, what are your thoughts? if you were faced with the task of buying the "good kind" of brownies, would you look to price, fat content, fair-trade, organic, or some other variable?
Monday, March 4, 2013
...and that's how i got involved in an illegal poker game
over the weekend i met some buddies for some festivities and poker. we were playing a simple 10cent/20cent cash game. we mostly just wanted to dick around and have a good time. there were five of us at the house and we were all a couple deep.
at about 12:30 the guy living in the house got a text about a $1 cash game at a separate house. we figured it would be fun to up the stakes a little bit.
my buddy assured me that almost all of the guys there were tanked. he said that so long as you played tight and made a move when you had a hand, you were essentially guaranteed to make money.
upon arrival, we quickly realized that the initial text was a lie. it wasn't a $1 cash game. instead, it was s $2/$5 game.
for those of you unfamiliar with cash poker games, you generally sit down at the table with 100 times the bet. that means that at minimum at this house, you were expected to sit down with $500. we were all a little buzzed, but none of us were going to be that stupid.
instead we each bought in for $200. no big deal, right? right.
in entirety, there were ten guys sitting at the table playing. as the dealer proceeded to deal out the hand i looked around and noticed that some stacks were considerably larger than mine. that's when i realized: most of these guys bought in for between $1,000 and $2,000.
obviously, at this moment there were multiple four letter words going through my mind.
i intentionally folded the first few hands to get a good read on the guys sitting at the table. these were all fairly rich guys that just wanted to BS and take money from each other. nonetheless, i noticed that the guys were playing pretty loosely. the upside: you can make a lot of money off of these types of guys. the downside: they can push you around, get lucky, and take all of your money quickly. i also noticed that - even to see a flop - i was going to have to spend at least $40 since that was the apparent standard pre-flop raise. crap.
in about my 4th or 5th hand at the table i got dealt pocket jacks. i raised pre-flop to $35. there were a couple of blinds on the table and only one guy called me. the rainbow flop was a jack, 4, 2. i put out another $35. the guy next to me, with a stack of about $1,500 went all in. in that situation i absolutely could not fold, but knowing my luck, i was ready to get a bad beat and lose $200 in a matter of a few minutes.
i called, and he pretentiously looked at me and said, "sorry buddy, i got trips! welcome to my house! it's been fun taking your money!" he then flipped over a pair of 2s. i smiled, flipped over my cards, and he was pretty pissed. the turn was a 3 and the river was a queen. i took $200 from him almost right away.
a few hands later i had A/J both diamonds. i raised to $20 pre-flop and had a few callers. the flop came A/J/6 and i was feeling great. i made a decent sized bet and only one guy called. it was the same guy i beat earlier. at this point he's talking smack along the lines of "i gotta get my money back from you little piece of shit." he's betting aggressively and running his mouth about how many outs he has for both a straight and a flush. i just push all in to make the action on him. he calls claiming he "likes his percentages."
i flip over ace jack. he flips over ace ten. the next card is an ace...the river is a jack. at this point he's just pissed. oh well.
i dicked around the rest of the night, made a few dumb moves, made one incredible lay down, and overall had a good time. i didn't get back to my apartment until about 4:30 in the morning, but my bulging wallet suggested it was worth it.
anyway. upon looking up north dakota gambling laws i affirmed what i first suspected. house games cannot exceed $500. so, yeah, i can finally say that i was part of an illegal, underground poker game. i'll cross that one off of my bucket list.
at about 12:30 the guy living in the house got a text about a $1 cash game at a separate house. we figured it would be fun to up the stakes a little bit.
my buddy assured me that almost all of the guys there were tanked. he said that so long as you played tight and made a move when you had a hand, you were essentially guaranteed to make money.
upon arrival, we quickly realized that the initial text was a lie. it wasn't a $1 cash game. instead, it was s $2/$5 game.
for those of you unfamiliar with cash poker games, you generally sit down at the table with 100 times the bet. that means that at minimum at this house, you were expected to sit down with $500. we were all a little buzzed, but none of us were going to be that stupid.
instead we each bought in for $200. no big deal, right? right.
in entirety, there were ten guys sitting at the table playing. as the dealer proceeded to deal out the hand i looked around and noticed that some stacks were considerably larger than mine. that's when i realized: most of these guys bought in for between $1,000 and $2,000.
obviously, at this moment there were multiple four letter words going through my mind.
i intentionally folded the first few hands to get a good read on the guys sitting at the table. these were all fairly rich guys that just wanted to BS and take money from each other. nonetheless, i noticed that the guys were playing pretty loosely. the upside: you can make a lot of money off of these types of guys. the downside: they can push you around, get lucky, and take all of your money quickly. i also noticed that - even to see a flop - i was going to have to spend at least $40 since that was the apparent standard pre-flop raise. crap.
in about my 4th or 5th hand at the table i got dealt pocket jacks. i raised pre-flop to $35. there were a couple of blinds on the table and only one guy called me. the rainbow flop was a jack, 4, 2. i put out another $35. the guy next to me, with a stack of about $1,500 went all in. in that situation i absolutely could not fold, but knowing my luck, i was ready to get a bad beat and lose $200 in a matter of a few minutes.
i called, and he pretentiously looked at me and said, "sorry buddy, i got trips! welcome to my house! it's been fun taking your money!" he then flipped over a pair of 2s. i smiled, flipped over my cards, and he was pretty pissed. the turn was a 3 and the river was a queen. i took $200 from him almost right away.
a few hands later i had A/J both diamonds. i raised to $20 pre-flop and had a few callers. the flop came A/J/6 and i was feeling great. i made a decent sized bet and only one guy called. it was the same guy i beat earlier. at this point he's talking smack along the lines of "i gotta get my money back from you little piece of shit." he's betting aggressively and running his mouth about how many outs he has for both a straight and a flush. i just push all in to make the action on him. he calls claiming he "likes his percentages."
i flip over ace jack. he flips over ace ten. the next card is an ace...the river is a jack. at this point he's just pissed. oh well.
i dicked around the rest of the night, made a few dumb moves, made one incredible lay down, and overall had a good time. i didn't get back to my apartment until about 4:30 in the morning, but my bulging wallet suggested it was worth it.
anyway. upon looking up north dakota gambling laws i affirmed what i first suspected. house games cannot exceed $500. so, yeah, i can finally say that i was part of an illegal, underground poker game. i'll cross that one off of my bucket list.
Tuesday, February 26, 2013
Sunday, February 17, 2013
Respect
Reporter: "If you played in the NBA today, how many points would you average?"
Bill Russell: "Hmm....I suppose about 10."
Reporter: "Just 10 points per game?"
Bill Russell: "Well, I am 79 years old..."
Bill Russell: "Hmm....I suppose about 10."
Reporter: "Just 10 points per game?"
Bill Russell: "Well, I am 79 years old..."
Wednesday, February 6, 2013
Thursday, January 24, 2013
Saturday, January 19, 2013
Whhhhyyyy?
I had to share this. I may or may not have posted it. Those of you that have visited me will understand.
Friday, January 18, 2013
What is this I don't even
So I just saw an ad for a sleep aiding drug called Intermezzo. 3/4 of the ad was spent covering the possible side effects, including possible allergic fatal swelling of the tongue, hallucinations, confusion, dangers while driving or operating machinery, increased depressive or suicidal tendencies, running errands/having sex with no recollection etc... So I had already begun to think, "Who would actually use this drug?" But what really got me was the "common" side-effects, which included headache, nausea, and fatigue.
I'm tired because I can't sleep. Why don't I take this drug, that might kill me, so I can sleep through the night and feel tired.
How is this even on the market?
I'm tired because I can't sleep. Why don't I take this drug, that might kill me, so I can sleep through the night and feel tired.
How is this even on the market?
Tuesday, January 15, 2013
Here We Go Again
Well,
I can’t believe I’m saying this, but it’s that time of year again. You know, CONFERENCE CHAMPIONSHIP
WEEKEND. I’m going to dish out my
horrible analysis of what I see this coming weekend. Here goes nothing.
Ultimately,
there are four Super Bowl scenarios that could take place:
New
England vs. San Francisco
New
England vs. Atlanta
Baltimore
vs. San Francisco
Baltimore
vs. Atlanta
My
analysis here is eerily similar to last year (although I couldn’t find the
post? Perhaps I deleted it
accidentally?)
The
last thing I want to hear for two weeks is day-in and day-out analysis about “Harbaugh
Bowl” this or “Harbaugh Brothers” that.
If Baltimore and San Francisco both win, I won’t even want to watch the
Super Bowl by the time it rolls around.
There is only so much Harbaugh talk I can handle. I get it: it’s a great storyline. So let’s not ruin it, eh?
I
love New England at home. Had Denver
won, I would have had Denver favored to beat New England. Unfortunately Denver’s D choked late and
Manning threw that 2009-Brett-Favre-esque interception that will pain Bronco
fans for generations. We can’t talk
about what could have been, so let’s focus on what will be.
The
Pats’ offense is just too good. Even
without Gronk, they proved last week that they are a machine in which parts are
easily replaced. Missing a tight
end? No problem, we’ll have a running
back go balls out. As much as I love the
Ray Lewis storyline and would kill to see him go out on top, I just don’t see
the Ravens defense performing at a level capable of beating New England. Don’t get me wrong – I said the same thing
last year – so I will be pleasantly surprised if Baltimore keeps pace with the
Pats.
I
think Baltimore does have a slight advantage in that Flacco is playing for a
huge contract next season. I know most
people think this type of argument is complete BS – I’m generally in that same
boat. But when a kid makes it to the
playoffs every year of his career and just can’t quite make it past that last
AFC Championship hurdle, people start to notice. (Just look at Matt Ryan in the NFC; had
Atlanta lost last weekend the headlines would have been riddled with “choke” or
“Can Ryan Really Compete?” titles.)
Flacco has really surprised me this postseason with his stellar
play. Ray Rice hasn’t been much of a
factor, instead Anquan, Smith, and Pitta have stepped up at huge points in the game. Ultimately, I still see the Pats coming out on
top, but this time not because of a missed field goal.
New
England: 28
Baltimore:
24
In
the NFC we have an interesting matchup of one explosive offense and one
explosive defense. One incredible
athlete and one susceptible defense. I don’t
care that Atlanta is at home. Their
defense had holes last week against Seattle.
Were it not for an epic comeback (in what was one of the most exciting
playoff games I have seen in recent memory) Matt Ryan and company would be back
home wondering what the heck they do wrong every January. Fortunately for Matt Bryant, mulligans
apparently do count in the NFL.
The
key, however, is a simple question: how do you contain Colin Kaepernick? His game against Green Bay solidified him as
one of the most dangerous players in the postseason. His passes are not only accurate, but his arm
strength is impressive. Couple that with
his ungodly running ability and you have the new prototype NFL quarterback:
big, strong, quick, and accurate. (There’s
a reason Geno Smith is currently projected to be taken #1 in the 2013
draft. Welcome to the NFL of the
future.)
As
much as I love Atlanta’s offense, I hate Atlanta’s defense. I guarantee that once they finally contain
Kaepernick, he’ll run an option read, drop back to pass, and hit Crabtree all
night long for out routes and/or slant patterns for first downs. How do you stop that? Atlanta doesn’t have an upper-echelon cover
corner. That is the key to stopping this
kind of offense: have 7 or 8 in the box to prevent the run knowing that you
have shut-down corners/safeties to prevent the short gains and deep ball. Sorry Atlanta, but this one is in the bag for
San Francisco.
San
Francisco: 38
Atlanta:
27
For
the Super Bowl, I think this will be much like when New England faced the
Giants in 2012. San Francisco has a
solid pass rush capable of shutting down Brady.
Their run defense is one of the best and should really limit the success
of the Patriots both up the middle and downfield. Where New England could really hurt the 49ers
is if they run more sweep plays, bubble screens, or quick tosses to their
speedy inside receivers. The 49ers are
athletic up front, but those types of plays force the second tier to make
plays. Not that their linebackers are
bad by any means, but I’m sure if New England can get 4-5 yards per play, they’ll
take it.
Ultimately,
I see the 49ers stopping the Patriots on a number of possessions. Like the Falcons, I don’t think the Patriots have
a defense that is impenetrable. Again,
the option read will be powerful. I like
Talib in the secondary, but I think Vernon Davis’ athletic ability can
outperform any New England linebacker.
Instead of relying on Crabtree to make plays, Davis could be an option
up the middle. I see this as being not
so much a high scoring affair, as a game coming down to capitalizing on
opportunities. Whereas I foresee San
Francisco being able to capitalize repeatedly, I think New England will be
stymied on one or two important possessions.
San
Francisco: 34
New
England: 30
Here’s
a quick recap of my “bold predictions” from week 17 of last year:
- If the Giants lose Sunday, Tom Coughlin will be fired.
Well, the Giants won, so we may never know…I
still stand by this. He just happened to
win a Super Bowl instead…
- John Gruden will coach the Rams next year – which is a shame because I don't think it is fair to judge any coaching performance given the injuries the Rams have had this season.
- John Gruden will coach the Rams next year – which is a shame because I don't think it is fair to judge any coaching performance given the injuries the Rams have had this season.
I missed the boat on this one.
I was certain that Gruden had the itch to come back. I didn’t believe he liked the commentary
life. I was wrong. In my defense, the Rams did hire a
Gruden-esque coach in Fisher.
- Gary Kubiak will receive a contract extension even if the Texans lose in the first round.
Ding ding.
Kubiak signed an extension in June.
The Texans actually won their first round game, although this should be
considered even more impressive given the fact that Schaub was out for the
entire playoffs and they won the Wild Card game with a rookie QB.
- Andy Dalton will win the rookie of the year award.
Cam Newton won, which was a shame. Apparently individual numbers are more
important than leading a crappy team to the playoffs. Honestly, after their second seasons in the NFL,
would you rather have Cam or Andy?
Personally, I’d choose Andy. He’s
not as athletic, won’t put up comparable rushing statistics, but he’s a team player and the man doesn’t
whine. Take notes, Cam.
- Adrian Peterson will not play in week 1. I don't care what people and reporters are saying.
I’m glad I was wrong about this one. AP proved once again he is a freak of
nature. I like to think he viewed this
blog post and used it as motivation for the season. “I have to prove that douchebag Ahmed
wrong. He doesn’t know anything about
football.” Yeah, I’m sure AP’s thought
process went something like that.
- I will have a better fantasy football season in 2012 than I did in 2011.
Nailed it.
I took home over $300 in profits, and that was despite breaking even in
my $250 league.
Bold predictions 2013 edition:
-Former NDSU player/assistant coach Gus Bradley
will be a head coach next season
-The Bears will have a worse record than they
did this year
-Adrian Peterson will not rush for more than
2,000 yards (please use this as motivation)
-RG3 will not play in Week 1 of next season
(please use this as motivation)
-RG3 will, however, win rookie of the year
-Ray Lewis will mention his son’s NFL future
multiple times in his new gig as analyst
-Matt Barkley will not be the first QB drafted
(I’m saying this PRE-combine)
-New Orleans will be the most improved team
-The NFC East will have 2 teams in the playoffs
-The Bengals will not make the playoffs
Friday, January 4, 2013
FINALLY FIGURED OUT MY NEW E-MAIL
SORRY GUYZ, I TOTES MADE A BOO BOO.
apparently while updating my u of m e-mail, i was forced to get a gmail account. unbeknownst to me, my original u of m e-mail was linked to my blogger account. as a result, my original u of m e-mail would allow me to log-in, but every single time i just saw a blank screen on blogger. long story short, the new e-mail address i had to create for the u of m automatically became associated with the blogger account. who knew. after many missed posting opportunities, bockmed and i finally figured out what was wrong.
i've never seen this gif before, it's the reason why i wanted to post. enjoy:
http://i.imgur.com/4LVMd.gif
apparently while updating my u of m e-mail, i was forced to get a gmail account. unbeknownst to me, my original u of m e-mail was linked to my blogger account. as a result, my original u of m e-mail would allow me to log-in, but every single time i just saw a blank screen on blogger. long story short, the new e-mail address i had to create for the u of m automatically became associated with the blogger account. who knew. after many missed posting opportunities, bockmed and i finally figured out what was wrong.
i've never seen this gif before, it's the reason why i wanted to post. enjoy:
http://i.imgur.com/4LVMd.gif
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