Monday, August 29, 2011

Well, today

actually went a bit better than expected. For the most part, things ran much smoother than I expected and the new people seemed to be getting a bit more out of it than expected as well. I still think it would be more efficient to assimilate the new students in a steady trickle rather than intermittent tsunamis.

On that note. This is my first fantasy football post of the year. I just love football season. It's the easiest and, for me, most fun sport to follow and watch. It's fall. It's manly. Fantasy is geeky. It's perfect. I just finished drafting for the family league I will be in the running to win for a third straight year. It's twelve teams with pretty standard scoring and a lineup as follows: QB, RB, RB, WR, WR, WR/RB/TE, TE, DST, K, BN, BN, BN, BN, BN. There's a few things you need to know about my family league. People like to reach for players, and very easily get roped into following a run at a given position. This year wasn't as bad as the previous two in that regard, but I'll point out a few shining examples. This'll be a long one. Buckle up. Here Goes.

Round 1.
Things looked pretty standard. Due to Andre Johnson going at 4 and Mendenhall at 5, I managed to land Lesean McCoy at pick number nine. A. Rodgers and Vick went 11 and 12.

Round 2.
Roddy White, my man-crush from last year made it to me at pick four. The top 5 QBs were all gone by the end of the round. This is a league that gives only 4 points for a passing TD keep in mind.

Round 3.
The easy picks keep falling into my lap. I felt there were some reaches in this round. LeGarrette Blount and Brandon Lloyd (I smell one-year wonder) went, and Ahmad Bradshaw fell in my lap. 2 more QBs left the board.

Round 4.
This round was a perfect example of reaching for players and following a run. After Jermichael Finley went with pick three. Gates, Witten and Clark all also went. I decided to pass up Gates and go with who I considered the last remaining top-tier WR in Vincent Jackson. I've been feeling like targeting Gates at about this point all pre-season, but I just can't pass up a top WR when guys like Vernon Davis and Owen Daniels would still be available later.

Round 5.
Round 5 was home to the reach of the draft. Nate Burleson: pick one of round 5 to my cousin Serena. I also think Mark Ingram was a [very hype-ey] reach in this round. Knowing that the next 6 picks before my next didn't need a QB, I knew I would have Big Ben coming to me in the 6th so I went with Santonio Holmes after my brother took Knowshon Moreno, who I had been eyeing up. Oh yeah, the first defense went in round five. Classic family league.

Round 6.
The trend of TEs getting overdrafted continues. Davis went in round 5 and Daniels and Winslow went in round 6.

Round 7.
3 more TEs go. I landed Brandon Jacobs to corner the Giants running game market, knowing how injury/fumble prone Bradshaw can be.

Round 8.
I grab Fred Jackson. I felt like getting a starting running back who'll be a pretty sure thing to put up 1000 total yards and a handful of TDs was a steal at this point in the draft. The defenses keep coming off the board.

Round 9.
The first kicker goes. I grab Austin Collie. At this point, the injury risk is more than worth what you can get out of Collie with a healthy Peyton throwing to him.

Round 10.
More kickers. I grab Grab pierre Garcon. See Austin Collie: injury risk, Peyton Manning.

Round 11.
I take the 13th TE of the draft, Marcedes Lewis. I'm not really a believer in the guy or in the stability of the Jaguar's passing game, but the guy did get 700 yards and 10 TDs last year. Seriously. Talk about falling in my lap.

Round 12.
Pretty typical late round picks. Defenses, backup QBs and "lottery ticket" WRs and RBs go. I went with Jerome Harrison on the theory that Jahvid Best whacks his shin on something in the dark and misses 6 games this year.

I used my last two picks to take the Lions' D and Matt Bryant.

At the end of the day this is what my team looks like.

QB: Roethlisberger
RB: mccoy
RB: Bradshaw
WR: White
WR: V. Jackson
RB/WR: Holmes
TE: M. Lewis
K: Bryant
DST: Detroit

BN: Jacobs
BN: Jackson
BN: Collie
BN: Garcon
BN: Harrison


Quick Hitters;
Of course everyone will feel like they had the best draft. But I think I'm legitimately justified in saying that. I'm more than solid at RB, have an underrated QB, stacked WRs and a TE that if capable of even partially replicating last year, will easily give me the best return on investment imaginable.

I like having the Giants tandem. I've either got a stud and a dud or a solid 2nd running back and a viable flex player no matter what happens in that very good run game.

I also like having both Collie and Garcon. I hopefully won't need either of them, but one could emerge as a star across from Reggie Wayne.

And I really think Harrison could have some value. Jahvid best is *really* fragile.

I think there's only myself, one or two cousins and to some degree my brother that understand how to draft for value, and as such, there's only 1 or 2 other teams that I'm afraid of right now.

Have I mentioned how much I love McCoy and White? I had both in this league last year, and I have to say, even though I had to trade McCoy (for Aaron Rodgers :D) they won me the league through value and consistency.

Hot damn I love this season. I've got one more draft coming up next weekend with a bunch of guys I've never played with before. It should be interesting to see how this goes.




Sunday, August 28, 2011

You can't say happiness without saying penis.

Tomorrow could be a lot of fun.
My genius boss (if I haven't ranted about him before, I'm sure I will some day) decided that in order to reach our employment goals (in order to do what we need to do with students that work 10 hrs a week during the school year, we need to hire a LOT more people), the best way to do that would be to just take every god damn applicant, hire them and bring them all in for a big orientation. Tomorrow is day 1 of orientation for about 40 students. To put that into perspective, on any given day this summer we had 15 to 25 students working. Somehow we expect to at least introduce every student to everything that we do in two days. It'll be chaotic. We will probably lose the attention of such a large group at some point or another. We expect 60 people to all eat lunch in the same half hour time period in our little break room. I just don't see what my boss expects to accomplish. The best part is that most of them won't actually start working for another month. They won't retain jack shit. Why not just hire a few students a week and gradually assimilate them as we approach the time we need them, rather than do this? Oh yeah, that would make sense. That's not how NOvA rolls. We don't do science, and we don't know how to organize a large institution.

Oh well, with any luck my interview for a co-op position on Thursday will go well and I won't be working there anymore.
The draft for my family's fantasy football league is tomorrow night. I smell a three-peat. Or maybe that's just the jalapeno-cheddar brats talking. I can't tell.

Saturday, August 27, 2011

fantasy football - draft 2

i had another draft earlier this week.  it is a brainerd league that has been going on since the early 2000s.  i consistently do well in it and (over the long term) have made money from it.

scoring in this league is quite a bit different.  (it's anything but standard).  for starters, all touchdowns are 6 points.  this really inflates the value of a QB.  for the longest time most people in our league didn't understand this.  every year i would swipe the first QB off of the board in the 2nd or 3rd round and would do quite well throughout the year.  over time, however, more people have caught on to this and QBs are taken immediately following the top tier RBs.  for example, looking at the draft results, there were 6 QBs taken in the first two rounds.  (last year people mocked me for taking rodgers #5 overall in that league...they weren't laughing when i dominated the regular season and lost a heart breaker in the championship game.)

in addition to inflated QB values, yards are as follows:
passing: 50 yds per point
rushing: 20 yds per point
receiving: 20 yds per point

this creates pretty low scoring.  think about it: 120 rushing/receiving yards and 300 passing yards are the equivalent of a TD.  yeah, it's kind of a crazy league.

i had the #9 overall pick.  it's a snake format.  i'll provide my analysis.

1st round: lesean mccoy.
i couldn't believe he fell to me  here.  i told myself i wouldn't draft a QB in the first round if one of my top 4 guys were still available.  mccoy is #4 on my board, so i was stoked when he was still here.  i think philly's offense will be pretty tight.  you can't deny that he gets a ton of yardage and hopefully he'll see more trips to the endzone.

2nd round: michael vick.
again, HOW DID I GET SO LUCKY?  my initial strategy was to take either rodgers or vick at #9, depending on their availability.  i was pretty sure that they would both be gone by #9 overall.  rodgers went #5 and i was preparing to take vick until mccoy dropped to me.  on the comeback the top 3 WRs were taken and for whatever reason phillip rivers was taken one pick ahead of me.  vick fell to me, plain and simple.  these are the breaks that can define a championship season.  i really hope he performs up to his 2010 standards.  i know there are a lot of people not willing to gamble on vick this year....but i'm a gambling man.  if he hits, i think i'll hit it big.

3rd round: mike wallace.
ouch.  on my target board i was really wanting to get a strong #2 RB.  i watched as matt forte kept falling.  i was really hoping he would slip to me and then...BOOM i got sniped one pick beforehand.  at this point all of the elite WRs were gone and i had a choice between reggie wayne or mike wallace.  99 times out of 100 i would take wayne.  but i'm just not convinced that peyton will be fully healthy this year.  i know he never misses games, but for whatever reason i'm afraid of major neck surgery.  i trust painter (sarcasm) very much, but you can't deny wallace's speed and frequent endzone visits (which is vital in this league).  wallace it is.

4th round: dez bryant.
again, i got sniped at this pick.  i really wanted jahvid best, but he got taken (yet again) the pick immediately before mine.  deangelo williams was the best RB on the board, but between his injury history and splitting time with jonathan stewart, i just didn't feel good taking him there.  i've always been a huge dez bryant advocate.  it's one thing to have a ligament injury, but it's another to break a bone.  broken bones are much easier to come back from--and let's be honest--he had a pretty good rookie campaign.  i love dallas' offense this year, and i really think romo will utilize all of his weapons.  between miles austin and jason witten in the air and felix jones on the ground, i think bryant will have plenty of opportunities to make big fantasy impacts this year.

5th round: jason witten.
i know what you're thinking: "is ahmed a huge fan of the NFC east or something?"  the answer is no.  as it turns out, 2 eagles and 2 cowboys just happened to be the best names on my board at that given time.  i really wanted to get my #2 RB at this position, but by this time all of the available running backs had a much lower value than witten.  if it's a choice between taking witten or fred jackson, i take witten every single time.

6th round: ryan matthews.
at this point i really had to fill my #2 RB hole.  i was very apprehensive about taking matthews here.  splitting time with tolbert is definitely an issue, although norv turner claims that matthews is the number one option in san diego.  i know matthews came into camp in poor condition, but all of the latest reports talk about how his conditioning has improve immensely during training camp and how he is looking good.  my hope is that he will live up to his pre-draft 2010 hype and become an elite RB.  i doubt it'll happen, but if it does, my team is set.

7th round: knowshon moreno.
since i knew that my #2 RB would be weaker than everyone else in the draft, i felt i should draft moreno for emergency purposes.  mcgahee will certainly take looks away from the goal line, but moreno is still a #1 back for a team that (historically) has always loved to rush the ball.  if matthews doesn't turn out the way i think he will, moreno is a serviceable option for his replacement.

8th round: daniel thomas.
i know it is ridiculous to take 3 RBs in a row, but hear me out: as mentioned in my first post, i'm pretty big on thomas this year.  i love his frame and guarantee that he gets any type of goal line look first ahead of bush (or anyone else on miami for that matter).  plus, due to some overlapping bye weeks, i needed another RB.

9th round: michael crabtree.
this was a reach.  i really needed my final WR slot filled.  historically, this has always been my strategy in this league: don't worry about your final WR slot until late in the round.  the way i figure: with our yardage numbers as they are, there's always going to be one position on a team that doesn't contribute much.  think about it: a player gets 50 yards receiving.  in our league, that's 2.5 points...hardly anything.  i'd much rather have my #3 WR be my lack-of-points guy than my QB or either of my RBs.  every team always has a hole in their lineup--that's just the beauty of fantasy football.  i decided to keep my "hole" at the 3rd receiver position.  crabtree might stretch the field a little bit with edwards in town.  i don't love this pick, but i don't hate it either.

10th round: joe flacco.
with that, i took the first backup QB of the draft.  you can see my first draft analysis for flacco.  let's just say i'm big on him this year and love him as a backup QB.

11th round: davone bess.
i was targeting danny amendola here as i think he'll have an improved/bigger role in the rams' offense this year.  but guess what: he got taken the pick before me.  bess puts up good yardage and is mostly a strong PPR guy.  he'll find the endzone occasionally.  i mostly just picked him up in case crabtree is even more of a disappointment than his career thus far.

12th round: brandon pettigrew.
a solid backup TE in an offense that i think will really take off this year.  pettigrew got me through the hard times of my big-money-PPR league last year.  this was more a sentimental pick than anything, but one i think can turn into fantasy production so long as stafford stays healthy.

13th round: derrick mason.
will he play much?  will he get cut?  will he be targeted at all behind plaxico and santonio?  who knows.  is he a proven veteran with leadership capability and an uncanny ability to pick up offenses and find open spaces on the field?  yes.  is that worth a 13th round pick?  to me, yes.

14th round: detroit DST.
let's just hope between suh, fairley, and vandenbosch that my sack total is about 5 per week.  definitely not the best defense in the league, but with fantasy football it's always a tossup when it comes to which DSTs will be in the top 10 in point production at the end of the year.  who knows, maybe detroit will be one of those surprises.

15th round: nick folk.
mark sanchez still has a tendency to stall drives just outside of the red zone.  let's hope that this continues and that folk is accurate enough to consistently make those 40-yarders.

starting lineup:
QB: vick
RB: mccoy
RB: matthews
WR: wallace
WR: bryant
WR: crabtree
TE: witten
K: folk
DST: detroit

BN: moreno
BN: thomas
BN: pettigrew
BN: bess
BN: flacco
BN: mason

as a whole, i'm fearful to see what kind of production comes out of my #2 RB and #3 WR slots.  in a league that so heavily favors TDs, my hope is that vick and wallace carry me throughout the year as mccoy and bryant occasionally pitch in as well.  for a league where 65 total points in a week is generally a good score capable of winning the matchup, i'll be really confident if and only if vick, wallace, and witten maintain the same levels of production they had last year.  it'll be interesting to see how this team turns out.

Sunday, August 21, 2011

fantasy football - draft 1

i had my first fantasy football draft of the year.  it was for a 12 team, 1/2 point PPR, 1 keeper team.  the one rule for the keeper is as follows: if you keep a player, you have to draft him one round earlier than you drafted him the year before.

i inherited a really crappy team from a guy who drafted really crappily.  my only real option worth keeping was tom brady.  last year he was taken in the 3rd round.  considering i had the 5th overall pick, i felt that keeping him in the 2nd round at pick #19 was a fair value.  it's a little high for where i would place brady...but given my options, it was the only thing i could do.

the draft went well except for the fact that some teams are just stacked.  for example, ray rice was drafted in the tail end of the draft years ago.  so despite being kept for a few years, he still went in the 8th round.  jamaal charles went in the 7th.  arian foster went in the 11th.  keep in mind that these teams still had a 1st round pick.  so when it comes down to it, some clubs literally have 2 top 5 running backs.  insane.

before i get into the draft, i feel like i should preface my analysis with a few statements.  first, this was the first year i drafted with these guys.  i'm really only friends with one of them and loosely know a second.  i had no idea how they would be drafting.  as it turns out, they a) are "homies" (vikings players go way higher than they should); b) overvalue RBs; c) draft sleepers much earlier than anticipated.  i was pretty shocked by some of their drafting habits.  for example, devin aromashodu (spelling?) went in the 6th round...THE SIXTH ROUND.  i couldn't believe it.  players like turner, jackson, gore, and forte went before roddy white was taken as the 2nd receiver.  i was also shocked by how many QBs were taken early.  maybe this gives you a better idea of the guys i was drafting with.

this is how my draft went.

round 1: andre johnson.
my analysis: with rice, charles, and foster being kept, i really had no options at the #5 spot.  ap, cj, mjd, and lesean rounded out the top 4.  mcfadden was on the board, but on my cheatsheet i had andre having a bigger year so i took him as a no brainer.  i'm ok with having the best WR in the game, especially given the RBs that were available.

round 2: tom brady.
i was stuck with him here.  like i said before, probably a little high, but i'll still take him.

round 3: peyton hillis.
i was surprised when peyton slipped down to me.  i know he'll have some carries taken away by starks, and with hardesty coming off of surgery who knows.  i hope cleveland doesn't have a run-by-committee year, but all i've heard is that hillis will still be the focal point.  considering his PPR production and that so many other RBs had been taken (again, not sure how he slipped down to me) i felt that this was the best value on the board.

round 4: brandon marshall.
i know i know i know.  i had to put up with marshall last year in my "big money" league.  he is a total head case.  that being said, i see signs of improvement in the dolphins preseason games.  and marshall always gets a ridiculous amount of targets during games.  i'd much rather have a guy who will get targets than a guy who is guaranteed to catch a ball but will only be thrown to 5 times a game.  again, at this point in the draft i was shocked at how many RBs were gone and felt that there was so much value at WR that i had to draft marshall.  he was clearly the best on my board.

round 5: stevie johnson.
this was by far the toughest pick for me.  for some strange reason (likely because by this point every team besides mine already had 2 or 3 RBs) but somehow felix jones fell all the way to me at this position.  this pick was a huge tossup for me because i love jones' PPR value.  and you can't overlook the fact that he also had 800 rushing yards last year.  however, on my board (and i know a lot have him lower) i had johnson right beneath marshall.  basically, by my rankings, it was as though not one other WR had been taken the entire time.  now, i know with the bills trading way evans that johnson really has no deep threat to make him valuable.  and i know that the bills' passing game will probably suck and that johnson will get double covered throughout the year.  but at that value, i just had to snatch him up.  the way i look at it: 1200 total yards and 40 receptions from jones isn't going to get me as far as 900 yards and 80 receptions from johnson.  even though there is a minute difference in points there, johnson still gets me more in the long run.

round 6: benjarvus green-ellis.
this was a stretch.  at this point i knew i really needed my #2 running back and there was no one available.  i don't like this pick at all....who knows what will happen in new england with woodhead, ridley, and vereen in town.

round 7: daniel thomas.
i couldn't believe he fell to me here.  i wanted to pick him over the law firm in round 6, but felt that i needed a proven veteran with goal line experience, so i passed on thomas.  when he fell to me on the comeback of round 7, i was elated.  i think he'll have great value in miami, even with bush in town.  plus, if the year goes well, he could be my keeper next season.

round 8: kellen winslow
by this point the draft was getting pretty thin.  i needed a tight end and all the top tier guys had been taken.  people forget that winslow led the buccaneers in receptions last year.  he might not get as many targets with mike williams emerging, but he'll still be a productive TE.  the only downside is that he hasn't had more than 5 TDs in his career...hopefully he'll turn that around in the first year i've ever drafted him.

round 9: joe flacco.
again, since the draft was getting thing, i thought i would be the first to take a backup QB since i had his value much higher than any remaining RB/WR/TE.  i thought last year was a fluke for flacco.  if he turns out to be the QB i think he will be, i'll have the safest QB situation in the league.

round 10: mike thomas.
again, this was a crapshoot like many other players i took.  with mike sims-walker out of jacksonville, thomas could be just like stevie johnson: double covered and the only receiving threat on his team.  how this impacts his value could bite me in the butt if he's always covered.  i hope he turns out--he would be a great bye week filler.

round 11: danny woodhead.
with woodhead still on the board, i decided to draft him for 1) his PPR value but also 2) as insurance in the event that the law firm gets injured.  woodhead is an all around guy who can provide decent total yardage, receptions, and touchdown value.

round 12: kevin walter.
i figured that if thomas doesn't pan out, walter is a safe bye week filler.  i know that he'll always be second fiddle to AJ and owen daniels, but he's still a great slot receiver who will get you 5+ receptions a game and about 60 yards per.  he's good for the occasional TD as well.  i know jacoby jones splits time with walter, but i'm totally fine with him serving solely a bye-week-filler type of role.

round 13: zach miller.
again, wtf am i doing?  i keep drafting all of these guys in new situations, whether it is losing a teammate or moving to a new team.  do i feel comfortable with him getting thrown to by either t-jack or charlie whitehurst? heck no.  do i feel comfortable with him playing second fiddle to mike williams and sidney rice?  heck no.  do i think he was the best player overall available at that point in the draft?  yes, yes i do.

round 14: kansas city DST.
hopefully the run defense prevents points on the board and hali gets me 50 sacks.  'nuff said.

round 15: alex henery.
the most accurate kicker in college football history.  he'll easily become a top-10 kicker this year and, if no one on my team pans out, will be my keeper next year.

overall summary:

i took a lot of gambles on players in new situations.  honestly, i don't like this team much at all.  for all practical purposes, hillis, johnson, and thomas may suffer given their new situations.  marshall may continue to be a head case.  the law firm and woodhead may share carries between 4 running backs in new england.

i'm scared for what this season may offer.  hopefully the changes all of these guys are encountering are good ones.....or else i'm definitely missing the playoffs.

final roster:

QB: brady
RB: hillis
RB: the law firm
WR: AJ
WR: marshall
TE: winslow
FLEX: stevie johnson
K: henery
DST: chiefs
BN: daniel thomas
BN: flacco
BN: mike thomas
BN: woodhead
BN: walter
BN: miller

Sunday, August 14, 2011

So I got some sweet texts from Ahmed last night

Here are some winners:

"I love you font ever forget that kept move to massachusetts."

" "pooping" brb."

"I just pooped born kernels. It makes sense though because i had born for lunch"


I love you buddy.

bockmed can tell you the kind of night i had

and yet i still won $200 between blackjack and paddle wheel.

i love my life.