Deep Thrusts

The other day I was watching some SportsCenter when this little Geico commercial (the one with the woodchucks and the old guy) reminded me of a note I wrote down a few years ago and posted up on the facebooks. So I figured I would go ahead and put that wonderful stream of thoughts in its rightful home. Here it is.

How much wood could a woodchuck chuck, if a woodchuck could chuck wood? Probably a lot. They're beefy little critters. I bet if they could stand on their hind legs, had rotatable shoulders and opposable thumbs to grip the wood, they could probably chuck a lot of wood. But, how much wood WOULD a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? I don't think they would chuck very much wood. If they were capable of chucking wood, they would probably dedicate themselves to tasks that they would also be able to do if they could chuck wood. Like building houses or chucking stones. Plus if your name was Carpetthrow, wouldn't you think it a little cliche to be throwing carpet all the time? You probably wouldn't feel dignified, and would likely avoid throwing carpet.




You're welcome.